cgm13.net :: the boy wonder: July 2003

There! And now that the backgound image is showing up I have decided that it needs to be changed. Stay tuned for more ~~exciting~~ mediocre web design.

Argh!!! My new background image isn't showing up. Argh!!!!

Hmmmm. An interesting take of the Christian Right and Harry Potter can be read here.
[Sent via "The Man"]

Management here at CGM13 World News is in an attempt to make viewing all little better for you folks who have 1024x768 or 1280x854 screen resolutions. Maybe a new redesign will make its way here in the near future ... if management can get off its lazy ass and get productive, that is.

In a major blow to evil doers everywhere, Route 666 (also know as the "Devil's Highway" or "Highway to Hell" which runs through New Mexico, Colorado and Utah) has officially been renamed.

Here's an idea ... since big, Broadway musical remakes of movies is the current trend, I say that "South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut" needs to land on the Great White Way. What could be better? The movie already has songs by Trey Parker and Mark Shaiman that brilliantly satirize everything from Walt Disney to Les Miserables. There are so many great moments that could really come to life on stage: the Terrance and Phillip "Uncle Fucka" movie segment, Cartman and the v-chip to keep his potty mouth under control, Winnona Ryder and her amazing Ping Pong balls, Big Gay Al. And can't you just see big, excessive Broadway stagings of "Blame Canada," Saddam Hussein's admonitions that "I Can Change" to his butt-boy Satan, the American/Canadian war and Stan's first encounter with the clitoris? Oh, baby. It would be so sweet!

Well, the New York Trip details keep on changing. We might be in a different hotel than the one originally scheduled. That's a bummer. I really like the Hotel Edison and getting to eat a big greasy breakfast in the "Polish Tea Room." We are definately not going to be seeing "Hairspray: The Musical" but might see the rivial of "Nine" with Antonio Banderas. Two restaurants that I am looking forward to eating at again are Tutta Pasta (though I think it's now Bella Pasta) in the Village and Gabriela's on the Upper West Side. Mmmmm.

Yeesh. Not dead ... just busy. In the meantime, enjoy my new favorite song.
Blue States: Season Song [5.84 MB]

So, there seems to be a lot of buzz about the new tacked on alternate ending to "28 Days Later." The complaint that I heard most about the film was about the so-called "happy" ending ... and, you know what, it didn't really bug me that much. The ending was "happy" but not so much so that it killed the horror of what comes before. To me, it didn't feel like a cheat (you know, like the ending of "Return of the Jedi" or "Fight Club"). So, I am dead curious to see the new "down beat" ending of the film which has been tagged on after the credits as a "what if this happened" ending. Will a pitch-black resolution to the story make the film more powerful? Or is it some clever marketing ploy to get audiences back into the theater seats on more time? I may have to lay down my money again and find out this coming weekend.

"Horror Movie Night: Part Two" Update:
Well, this one didn't go quite as well as the first one. We got a late start so that only two movies were shown ... "Dawn of the Dead" and "John Carpenter's The Fog." I think that "Dawn of the Dead" is one of the classics but nobody else really liked it. The consenus from Michelle, Michael and Nicole was that it was long, boring and overly violent. I disagree. "John Carpenter's The Fog" got a better reception and actually made them jump once or twice. The highlight was Michael's girly shriek at one of the really cheap scares. Heh, heh. For the next horror night the order of films will be "The Exorcist" and "Texas Chainsaw Massacre." Yeah!

Ah, yes ... some eye candy courtesy of past "Men" magazine covers. You know, I would give my left nut to have someone to smooch on tonight. Oh, well. Looks like more porn watchin' to pass a lonely Friday night.

Dang. Things here have been busy what with work and the new Powerbook to play around with. I noticed that I have done a mere one post per day for the past two days. Yow! And yes ... there are a few of you who I need to e-mail back. I will get there!

Tomorrow brings "Horror Night: Part Two" ... a night of horror films where I try and scare friends with some of the classics of the genre. You may remember that last time Michelle, Michael and Nicole were totally terrorized by "The Blair Witch Project," "Night of the Living Dead" and "The Ring." This time around we'll see what damage can be done by the zombies of "Dawn of the Dead," the ghostly sailors of "John Carpenter's The Fog" and the demonic Reagan in "The Exocist." Maybe if there is time I can unleash poor Sally's plight as she runs screaming in terror from Leatherface and Company in "Texas Chainsaw Massacre." And for those of you who have never seen that film, you really need to before (what is sure to be a really suck-ass movie) the big-budget remake hits theaters this fall. Damn ... nothing is sacred. Remember the "Psycho" remake that was so, so, so, so awful?

Since New York City is only a little over a month away, here is a list of the top five best Broadway shows I have seen over the past ten years:
1) "Metamorphoses"
2) "Urinetown: The Musical"
3) "Cabaret"
4) "An Inspector Calls"
5) "Passion"

From Ralph in Australia:
"Yay for you on the Powerbook - it is trully the closest thing to sex available."

Yes. Yes it is. Actually, I have already changed underwear three times today. Viva-la-Macintosh!

From my friend Mitch in Missouri:
"I mean it's only a computer, and a Mac at that. And just how good does it have to be to download porn? You know there are still folks out there who swear Betamax is the best thing ever. Oh well, I hope you enjoy your toy, and don't forget to wipe it off after each fevered lovemaking session."

First of all, the ultra-sharp 15.2-inch (diagonal), 1280x854 resolution, TFT display makes downloaded porn more of a visual feast. Second of all, the stunningly sleek Titanium exterior is easy to wipe down after each use. Viva-la-Powerbook!!!

So, my new toy is living up to everything that I hoped it would be. Mac OS X has a beautiful interface (though it is taking some getting used to) that puts anything those dumb Windows people could ever come up with to shame. And there is so much more to go on about ... so much that about wet myself everytime I think about it. Oh, baby!!! It turns out that happiness can be bought.

Dear sweet Jebus! It's here and more beautiful than I imagined. I am such a happy, happy boy right now!!!

Sweet. The ultra-excessive gift to myself is on the FedEx delivery truck and will arrive here in mere hours. Hee, hee!

Shit. Things never are easy or simple are they? I had it all worked out in my head. I had it all planned and now it's all screwed up. I thought that when He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named moved back to Florida in the next couple of months that "it" would be done. Out of site (and out of North Carolina), out of mind. Nah. It can't be that simple. Turns out it's a "vacation" to Florida and not a total address change. Of course, he was over at my place last night. I had made up my mind last month that I wouldn't have him back in my house by himself. Didn't take long for my resolve to fall by the wayside, did it? I am weak. Weak and stupid.

Damn. I drank way too much last night ... feelin' way too fuzzy this morning.

I can't even begin to tell you how much I love Tom and Jerry. Lots of people thing the Chuck Jones Looney Tunes are the greatest cartoons ever made and I will disagree. Hanna-Barbera's Tom and Jerry are the best hands down! I was real excited to find out that Warner Bros. has released two dvds of classic Tom and Jerry cartoons. There are some draw-backs though. The cartoons are not in their original theatrical ratios (ie widescreen or letterboxed). Plus, a couple of the cartoons have been cut to fit with the "politically correct" times we live in and that's a shame. The rumor on the internet is that next year will see the complete set of Hanna/Barbera's Tom and Jerry uncut and letterboxed on dvd. When that day comes I will wet myself several times and then pass out from sheer joy. In the meantime you can check out Tom and Jerry Online. It's a totally kick-ass site with tons of info (episode guides, images and video release news) on America's favorite cat and mouse duo.

It's official. When I drop into the Big Apple at the beginning of September, I will be seeing "Hairspray: The Musical" and the revival of "Gypsy." I am not so sure about "Hairspray" because the John Waters film was so damn good. I really hope that Bernadette Peters is still in "Gypsy" when we see it. How gay is that? Plus, all the NYC blogger buzz about "Avenue Q" has me really, really interested in seeing it as well. Damn. Four days just isn't enough time to do all I want to do. And, yes. I don't plan on spending all my time at Broadway shows.

Yeah, I have been stuck in "horror" mode for the past week or so. The other night I drug out my copy of Stephen King's "Carrie" for a quick re-read. Damn. I had forgotten just how much I love this book. I think the story resonates with me is because it's about the misfit's ultimate revenge. Way back in high school, I was one of the picked on. We even had a guy that I would liken to Carrie White. Leslie was the butt of endless pranks and taunting. We rode the same bus to school and day in and day out it was the same thing over and over again. Guys making fun of him because he was overweight and bookish (and I mean this guy was really smart). Girls would flirt with him ... get him all turned on and laugh and point if he happened to get an erection. I never took part in any of this. I just sat to the side and was very thankful that it wasn't me in the hot seat. In the end, nothing ever happened. Leslie bore the humiliations, everyone graduated and moved on. I still think about all this when a school shooting makes the news because there was a potential time-bomb sitting on the bus with me every day for years. A couple of years after my ten year high school reunion I ran into one of my classmates who had not attended. He said that the reason he didn't come was because (at some point during school) Leslie has said he would come to the reunion and make us all sorry. He believed that Leslie was capable of that much rage. He believed that ten years later Leslie would come back and have revenge against his tormenters and the rest of us that stood by and did nothing ... just like Carrie White in King's novel.

Poor Carrie ... little did she realize that she should have made her prom dress red to begin with. Then all the pig's blood wouldn't have mattered that much. Boy, the Senior Prom didn't go quite as planned.

Coming this Christmas to a theater near you
The most horrifying film to hit the screen ...
Weird Al Yankovic: Nature Trail To Hell [5.35 MB]

Poor Marcie ... little did she realize that her summer job just wasn't gonna turn out like she had hoped.

This weekend I also discovered that I am not nearly as apathetic about "certain people" as I thought I was. I bet this comes as a great shock to you loyal readers. Right?

Things that I learned some this round of horror:
1) Ghosts of southerners from 1865 know how to drive cars and use telephones.
2) No matter how fast you run the killer always knows the terrain better than you. Duh.
3) Matthew McConaughey needs to do an entire film wearing nothing but tighty whities.
4) Don't turn into a werewolf on national television. Nobody will believe it really happened.
5) Monsters don't always want to kill you. Sometimes they just want to fuck you.
6) Small town sheriffs are always hot-headed and ruggedly handsome. Yum!

Horror Movie Marathon Video Update:
1) "Two Thousand Maniacs" - Cult classic that just didn't do it for me.
2) "Curtains" - A great little Canadian slasher flick ... lots of fun.
3) "Frailty" - Another fun movie with a really twisting plot.
4) "The Howling" - An 80's werewolf classic. Better than I remember it being.
5) "The Beast Within" - Bad. And I mean "Jeepers Creepers" bad.
6) "It Came From Outer Space" - Another Jack Arnold classic.

And my big plans for the weekend are ...

So, Britney has fessed up that she had sex with Justin. Now if we can just get her to tell us how big his cock is ...

Poor Keith ... James Van Der Beek got married.

Humph! A new masthead idea is up for any of you who would care take a look. Jeez ... so much for staying away from black and grey.

I was gonna write about how being drop-dead gorgeous must be a requirement to be a Mormon Missionary. But, in seaching for some links I came across this. Now I can understand looking for someone based on sexual orientation and then letting the rest happen from there ... but looking for someone based on their religion is a little creepy. Ah, those crazy Mormons.

It's scary how fast you can apply for a credit card and have a $5,000+ credit limit dropped in your lap. Yes ... less than five minutes. Dead scary.

*Sigh*

Ooooo, baby! While it's still online you all really owe it to yourself to check out the 1987 film "Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story" directed by Todd Haynes. I saw this film years ago and was just blown away by it. Go. Watch.
[via Tyler via Jonno]

So, I feel as if I should clarify (thanks to Michelle). I do realize that the end of my post about "certain people" yesterday probably sounded a little hate-filled as opposed to apathetic. Well, the "fuck him" was meant to be more passive and not to be read full of hatred like: "fuck him I want to stick a knife in his neck and watch him die slowly."

Hmmmmm. I'm starting to feel bored with the look of this site. Might be time for a new masthead ...

But, in good news ... my Amazon package is now in the system and on its way.

I haven't mentioned He-Who-Must-Be-Named in a while. That's because I have developed a certain level of apathy for him ... even as a friend. I gotten to where I can't look at or listen to him with that unfettered adoration that I used to have for him. This was inevitable wasn't it? I feel like I have been fucked over. He did things (things that made me think he was interested) that straight men just don't do to other guys then says, "Hey, I'm not that way." I know that in his mind I am the one to be blamed for all this. That one statement absolves him from all guilt in his mind ... regardless of all his actions to the contrary. It does take "two to tango," right? As soon as he knew my feelings for him, he should have backed off and not been in my space all the time. I guess that as long as he feels no consequences then everything is good for him ... no emotional or mental fallout to deal with ... no worries. Well, fuck him for leading me on. Fuck him for all the shit I put up with. Fuck him for not caring about me even as a friend. Fuck him.

apathy
\Ap"a*thy\, n.; pl. Apathies. [L. apathia, Gr. ?; 'a priv. + ?, fr. ?, ?, to suffer: cf. F. apathie. See Pathos.] Want of feeling; privation of passion, emotion, or excitement; dispassion; -- applied either to the body or the mind. As applied to the mind, it is a calmness, indolence, or state of indifference, incapable of being ruffled or roused to active interest or exertion by pleasure, pain, or passion. ``The apathy of despair.'' --Macaulay.

Yeah. So I got chatted up by a really cute clerk yesterday when making a purchase at the local Circuit City. I was puchasing a copy of the 1976 film version of Stephen King's "Carrie" directed by Brian DePalma. He rang up my purchase and started talking about the really bad tv version that was recently shown on NBC. We then discussed the books "Dreamcatcher" and "From a Buick 8" and then talked a little about H.P. Lovecraft. Good thing that he mentioned an ex-girlfriend or might have made and idiot out of myself by asking him out. Dark, curly hair and into horror films/fiction. *Sigh* Sales clerks just need to ring up your purchases and not be overly friendly (unless they are hitting on you).

"UPS has received shipper's billing information electronically. Billing information received does not indicate shipment pickup or drop-off. Please contact the shipper for more details."

This really irritates me considering that there is no real way to contact Amazon to find out where my package is. According to them it's been shipped and is on its way. That's about all they are going to tell me at this point. And, as you can see from the above statement, UPS doesn't know anything either. The last order that I has shipped from Amazon via UPS had really screwy tracking too. The package was listed as arriving at the UPS terminal in Greensboro, NC then *poof* it's at my front door. Generally, the tracking will provide you info as it arrives and departs each and every terminal. I know for a fact that packages that come to my town get routed through Sylva, NC right before they get here. That info didn't appear last time. Argh!!! I wanna know where my stuff is! Damn my impatience. This is why I usually don't order stuff off the web unless I have to. I am all about some "instant gratification."

Also, I found a copy of Bjork: Live at the Royal Opera House on dvd. The concert was filmed in December of 2001 when she was touring for "Vespertine" with Zeena Parkins and Matmos. I can't even begin to describe to you how beautiful and exquisite the concert is. I almost cried several times while watching it. Yes. It's that good. Highlights for me were "Pagan Poetry," "Cocoon" and "Joga." Good, good stuff.

Yeesh. Back at work and I could probably use one more day to recover from the holiday weekend. I had performances of "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged)" on Thurday, Saturday and Sunday. Plus ... the big blow-out, get falling down drunk cookout on Friday. Man, what a blast. There's nothing like having tons of food, beer and friends for and entire day. The anal-retentive clean freak in me was upset about how trashed the kitchen and dining area were ... but that's what happens when 20+ people romp through your house in one day. Found the time on Saturday to see "28 Days Later" again. What a sweet film it is.

I should probably clarify ... I am not planning on eating all that meat by myself (no comments from the peanut gallery, please). But I do plan on doing my damnedest to drink all that beer myself. Folks, it's a holiday tomorrow. So get out there and party like it's 199 ... er, 2003. Viva la Party!

Lots 'o Cheap, Cheap Beer!

Lots 'o Meat!

The Fourth of July survival kit includes: 10+ pounds of ground beef, 3 pounds of all beef franks, 1 suitcase of Milwaukee's Best Ice. Viva la America, again!

Whoo hoo! We are 24 hours away from the patriotic celebration fo July 4th. I plan to show my true American colors by consuming way too much cheap beer and eating copious amounts of grilled meat products. Viva la America!

The roomie is starting to become depressed with my dvd collection and I really don't understand it. Everyone should like horror films ... right? Recent aquisitions include:
1) "The Exorcist: 25th Anniversary Special Edition" 1973, William Friedkin
2) "The House on Haunted Hill" 1959, William Castle
3) "Punch Drunk Love" 2002, P.T. Anderson
4) "Donnie Darko" 2001, Richard Kelly
5) "X-Files: Fight The Future" 1998, Rob Bowman
6) "Strait-Jacket" 1964, William Castle
7) "Homicidal" 1961, William Castle

It's time to start thinking about what's going to happen when the next election roles around. NPR has a section devoted to their interviews with the current 2004 Democratic candidates. Check it out and see where they stand. Regime Change Begins At Home!

So what am I if not a glutton for punishment? I am now currently reading "Dry" by the ulta-cute Augusten Burroughs and learning lines for my portrayal of Jason Posner in Margaret Edson's Pultizer Prize winning play "Wit." Yeesh. All this is going on while performing "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged)" at The Artists Resource Center in Asheville. Hmmmm. That means that I will have performed in four plays and directed one since the beginning of the year. Glutton for punishment? Yes, I think so.

Oh yeah ... nothing is really meant by that last post. I like the song because I think it's very apropos to how life seems to work ... or at least is working for me at this point.

You spurn my natural emotions
You make me feel like dirt and I'm hurt
And if I start a commotion I run the risk of losing you
And that's worse
Ever fallen in love with someone
Ever fallen in love in love with someone
Ever fallen in love in love with someone
You shouldn't've fallen in love with
The Buzzcocks: Ever Fallen In Love With Someone [3.6MB]