cgm13.net :: the boy wonder: May 2003

Watch the third episode of Teen Girl Squad. Go! Laugh! Now!

Instead of "sane," I should have said "sane-ish." I don't think that I have been sane for quite a while now ...

Heh, heh. The new pre-show music mix works! It's gonna be exciting to make the little blue-haired old ladies listen to Trent Reznor. The audience last night for the dress rehearsal gave some good feedback. So, we should have a kick-ass show for the folks attending opening night. Yeah. I know I am on about it a lot. "Rope" is what I have to focus on the keep myself sane.

Busy day. I have spent the morning mixing instrumental Nine Inch Nails for potential use as pre-show music for "Rope." We'll see how it plays tonight.

Looking back though old stuff I found an online test that I had taken last year. It's the Queer As Folk Personality Test and one of the few that I think actually nails me based on my answers ...

"You are Ted Schmidt! Rejection and insecurity are a way of life for the button-downed, pencil-pushing, tucked-in Ted. His hobbies include web porn, video porn, porn magazines and pining after codependent relationships and/or unobtainable men."

Yeesh. How true it is.

Heh. We got sweet coverage for the show in today's local paper.

And now, a moment of extreme hubris:
"Rope" presented by HART and directed by me is gonna kick so much ass. Yea for my wonderful cast and crew. And for myself, of course.

Memorial Day Weeend, a weekend to get out and have fun ... right? Mine was kinda quiet. Spent Friday night hanging out with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. I cooked. We ate. We drank and watched some movies. We dipped into the hot tub. Yeesh. Spent Saturday sanding the wood for a new dvd rack I am building. Some folks came over and hung out. Yep. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named came back over which surprised (and delighted) me. What a dumbass I am. Sunday was spent putting the first coat of stain on the aforementioned wood and cleaning the house. Whoo. Monday brought about a second coating of stain and an attempt to put in new lighting in the kitchen. As with all home improvement projects, I have discovered that I need to repaint the ceiling because there is now a huge yellowed square where the old fixture used to be. Geez. It never ends does it?

"Rope" (my fifth directorial effort) opens next Friday.

Damn! I missed my six month anniversary by two days. Yep, back last November the weblog currently on your screen was born and has lasted about 5-1/2 months longer than I thought it would. Here's to more porno fueled fantasies and self-obsessed posts. Viva la self-obsession!

To get to New York City:
1. Air Travel: $253 (1 hour 45 minutes of travel)
2. Amtrak Train: $184 (15 hours of travel)
3. Greyhound Bus: $118 (18 hours 20 minutes of travel)
Hmmmmm.

And so, the VCR here at the bosses' place (where I am house and hot tub sitting) promptly tried to eat the aforementioned video. Urgh.

Heh, heh. Pornography = Happiness.

I can't even begin to tell you how incredibly fucked up everthing feels right now ... and I am not just talking about my own stupid, pathetic love for He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. There is enough going on with just about everyone I know that it has me feeling overwhelmed and uneasy about what is going to happen on various fronts over the next few months. Think happy thoughts ... must think happy thoughts.

Who needs a boyfriend when you can have this to keep you company. Yeah. Coffee and a Powerbook are all I need.

"The Gazette has confirmed that there will be no Season 2 of Twin Peaks on DVD this year. We might be looking for first quarter of 2004 now for the Region 1 release. Meanwhile, expect the region 2 release of the DVD later this year."
Damn. And we thought it took forever for The Simpsons seasons to come out. 2004 will make 2+ years since the first season of Twin Peaks was released on disc.

in pitch dark i go walking in your landscape
broken branches trip me as i speak
just 'cause you feel it doesn't mean it's there
there's always a siren singing you to shipwreck (don't reach out)
stay away from these rocks we'd be a walking disaster (don't reach out)
just 'cause you feel it doesn't mean it's there (there's someone on your shoulder)
feel it
why so green and lonely
heaven sent you to me
we are accidents waiting
waiting to happen
Radiohead: There There

Since I have pre-ordered Harry Potter an the Order of the Phoenix from the local bookstore, I have been invited to a midnight pajama party to celebrate its release. I wonder if the Cute-Bookstore-Guy will be there in his pj's as well. I can already hear my come-on line: "So, since we're dressed for bed already ..."

Cigar Web Page Shopping Cart + Severe Headache = Very Unhappy Chas.

Hmmm. The weekend went by way too quickly, considering that not much happened. Went and had dinner at Sherry's where I saw He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named for the only time this weekend. I can't decide if that is good or not. Got to drive Lynnette's excessive new purchase. Bought two dvd's. Got very drunk on vodka tonics at Robert's wedding reception. Found out that a gay friend I have always found cute has slept with all our other gay friends but not with me. Yeah, that bummed me out. Sang "Kiss" by Prince karaoke-style while blitzed out of my mind. Spent the day alone yesterday. Soaked in a hot tub all by myself. 'Nuf said.

Ooooo. That Bjork webcast was pretty sweet. Maybe I should treat myself to a trip to NYC for the Cyclone Field concert ...

Yeah. As you can probably tell from the lack of posts the past few days that I am back in a bad frame of mind. There are tons of good things going on that I just can't focus on. It's the same old story. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Have I mentioned that I am madly in love with Robert Smith?

Let me forget. Let me forget or let me go. Let me go.
I'll keep it quiet as a whisper. I'll keep it low, low, low...
Never! The biggest word I ever heard.
Stop dead. You're getting too close ...

Before you even opened your eyes, I moved about a million ways.
I killed about a million people and filled about half a day.
Before you even opened your eyes, you had to have to ask me who.
I love it... I mean you...

My face was in your hands. You looked into my eyes.
You said I tasted right and swallowed me alive.
Words: Robert Smith

That nasty rumor about the group New York trip is true. Not enough people have signed up this time around. So, it looks like I will have to find my own way there.

As you probably guessed, I was thinking about ordering me some new porn until I saw the wonderful shipping restriction notice on the video that I was interested in. And, I really wanted to see that Parker Williams/Carlos Morales "scene." Dang it! This is just further "fuel to the fire" to get my ass out of North Carolina.

Grrrrrr ...
Controversial Videos
Why we can't ship "Uncensored" or "Hardcore" titles to these States:
Arizona, Florida, Georgia, Kentucky, Mississippi, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, Tennessee, Texas, and Utah. And these counties/cities: Orange county-CA, Los Angeles county- CA. and Salt Lake City, UT.
These titles contain material that could be considered "obscene" by your state.

So, here's the poster art I have designed for the show I'm directing.

Not much to say today. Busy, busy, busy ....

Very Random Tidbits for a Monday Afternoon:
1) The Cure's Trilogy Concert on dvd finally has a release date.
2) Sparky brings up some good points about the movie version of Nightcrawler.
3) Too much vodka can make you forget some things about Saturday night.
4) Ten days straight of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and I am still alive.

There's an evil rumor floating around that the September theatre trip to NYC is going to be cancelled. I hope not. Grrrrr.

As an interesting treat to you, my constant readers, I dug out my old site stuff. I started with a Geocities Account last February and then switched over to the cgm13.com address at the end of April. I just posted whatever was on my brain at the time. Sometimes the posts would sit for weeks at a time. Looking back over the pages makes me feel a little weird. Most of the stuff I wrote about then is a still what I write a lot about. Look it over and you'll probably think I am really, really suicidal. They stretch from March of 2002 until Mid-November and can be viewed from Front to Back and Back to Front.

I'll give you three guesses what Lance Gear is doing in this photo.

Sweet. The hot tub is officially fixed. Now, to see who I can get naked with in it.

After getting the new Madonna and the new Goldfrapp ... I know that years from now I will still be listening to Black Cherry and American Life will be sitting on the shelf. I'm comparing apples and oranges. The orange wins this time.

For the record:
I am not just sitting around thinking about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named every single minute of the day. I happen to be very smitten with the guy who runs one of our local bookstores. Now, to work up the nerve to ask him out ...

East/West Magazine is gone. But, remember! We still have Choire Sicha and Philo Hagen to keep us occupied.

Statement to me from He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named last night:
"So, what are we doing this weekend?"

There are so many things I can say about this. It sounds so "couple-ish" ... doesn't it? Could it be a Freudian slip? Could it be that he was making a jab back at me since I had said earlier in the evening that he only keeps me around for entertainment value? Or, could it be that he knows the score and is just fucking with my head again? Grrrrrrrrr.

God. My heart just stopped. C'mon ... breathe you dummy.

Everyone owes it to themselves to hear the full stream of the new Goldfrapp album Black Cherry. Go! Now!

In mere days, the olds farts (Michelle and me) will get old-school and see the Gore Gore Girls and The Cramps on stage at The Orange Peel. I wonder if there will be any slam dancing?

In other news ... someone thinks my picture is cute.

Eeeep. It's started pouring the rain again. I hope Michelle (who really is in danger of getting her house flooded) and her dog are doing well.

Damn that Jerwin. Now I have this whole Wolverine/Cyclops fantasy running through my head. I wonder if Hugh Jackman and James Marsden would consent to doing a homosexual love scene in the next X-Men movie? It's not like X2 wasn't slapped full of homosexual innuendo anyway.

And now ... sun. Seems like the weather forecasters have blown it again. Isn't that a shocker?

Crazy. They just dismissed schools in the county because of all the rain. I was just in town and there is a ton of water everywhere. The house below where I work is currently having its yard washed away because of the excess run-off. Living next to a good sized creek doesn't seem so appealing anymore ...

This has been the view from work for the past two days. Clouds and heavy rain ... it's supposed to this way all week long. But, you won't hear me complain too much. Depressing weather for a depressed mood.

Grrrrrr. I really hate that 28 Days Later (a film I am now really pumped to see) will be released on video in the UK next week. Meanwhile in the states, we have to wait until June 27th for a LIMITED release of the film. All this means is that it will take forever for the movie to come anywhere near me and that I need to look into getting a dvd player that will handle Region 2 discs.

I finally met the "guy down the hill" yesterday at a party. Mutual friends are a great thing when it comes to meeting folks. He seems like a cool guy. It turns out that he no longer lives close to where I work but has moved only about a mile and a half from where I live. Interesting. Then, the low self-esteem kicks in. I suspect that I am too out of shape and too old to get asked out. Geez. Where the hell are all the 30-40 year old gay men in this damn town?

Missing out? Catch the first episode of Teen Girl Squad!

Movie Update:
The talk of the town is X2 and boy does it deliver. Since they don't have deal with all that messy exposition on the characters, the movie kicks of at high speed and keeps the story moving along at a nice pace. A fun, fun comic book films. It's what Daredevil tried to be and failed miserably at. Also, saw the trailer to a film that really, really sparked my interest ... 28 Days Later. Hopefully Danny Boyle is returning to form.

Yep. May is National Masturbation Month with National Masturbation Day hitting on May 7th! So, get busy pleasuring yourself, people. I do all the time.

House sitting is about to become a super, sweet deal. Supposedly ... when the bosses go out of town again, later this month, their hot tub will be up and running again. It hasn't worked for the three years they have lived here. Now I will have a big screen tv, malt machine AND hot tub at my disposal. Plus, I get paid to stay and take care of this stuff. Rockin'!

The promotion machine is gearing up for the June 10th release of the new Steely Dan album. You can hear the first single "Blues Beach" here. Yes, you can stop laughing now. I likes me some Steely Dan.

Heh ... Throwing Rocks At Girls. What could be better?

It is now official ... well, as official as travel plans ever get ... I will visiting the great city of New York from September 4 to September 7. Not nearly a long enough visit, but it's better than nothing. Right!

As you can probably tell, if I had stupid amounts of money to spend I would blow most of it on original art from the artists I like. I would also have to have a boy toy or two, of course.